First things first

I would have to say, I constantly think about losing weight and toning up.
I’m not what most would consider ‘fat’, however I am 47 years old, have barely exercised over the past 20 years and certainly, with just about anything I wear, conscious of having to ‘suck my stomach in’, of lumps and bumps in places they shouldn’t be and generally just being ‘displeased’ with what I see in the mirror.

So, the 12WBT pre-season warm up?
I was reading the updates on facebook and thinking ‘Wow! Some of these girls are keen!’
People were losing 4/5kg before they even started.
I was amazed that they weren’t taking it easy, psyching themselves up mentally whilst still enjoying their last days of idleness, of freedom, gorging on their favourite ‘naughties’ and simply enjoying the last of their ‘pre 12WBT’ forbidden ‘everything’.
Well I was..

I did do a couple of things that I thought showed commitment.
I did the psyching bit and I hunted down a workout bench on Gumtree.

My gut and the workout bench

I cleaned out the fridge – oh yeah – that was a cleansing in more ways than one – stinky and shocking and very satisfying. Thanks Mish, I loved that bit – yep, out with the left over cream cheese frosting we were ‘using up’ on crackers – shockers!! Can you believe, as I washed it down the sink my husband was still scooping bits out with a biscuit? He will kill me for telling 🙂

‘Wet’ cream cheese in the background!

I planted a little herb garden, my main inspiration being the price of all the fresh herbs I stocked up on from the shopping list.

Speaking of shopping lists!
I usually shop every day.
Yes, I know, it’s ridiculous, but I can’t help it. There’s something about a fully laden trolley that frightens me.
It yells ‘domesticity’.
It screams ‘money, money, money’.
It whispers ‘organisation’ in my ear; ‘planning and discipline’ and also mutters ‘boring housewife’.. over and over again.
For me, everything about filling up a family sized shopping trolley is everything that I am afraid of being.
I don’t know why.
My mum never did ‘THE. BIG. WEEKLY. SHOP.’, even though there were six of us.
I don’t know why about that either.

So, cutting to the chase, I did ‘THE. BIG. WEEKLY. SHOP.’ using the convenient shopping list I could print out that related to the menus for the WHOLE WEEK!
(By the way, I got one of those ‘shallow’ trolleys. There’s no way I’m getting a ‘family sized’ one for two of us).
As I collected up almost a whole market garden worth of fresh vegetables, it occurred to me that some of them would be past their expiry date by the time I came to use them.
I put some back, thinking YAY!! I will have to pick up some groceries during the week!

As it turned out, we didn’t quite get through all that I had bought.
I did return once or twice to the supermarket for a couple of things like the meat.
I don’t think overall that I spent any more than I normally would shopping every day.
That’s what everyone has been telling me forever and I know it’s true.
I just have never felt good about ‘weekly shops’.
Maybe it’s something to do with ‘living in the moment’.
I’m not a hippy or anything.
I just find it hard to plan anything, other than the afternoon of the day I am in (if that).

Here’s the fridge in complete shock, full of VEGETABLES!?

Oh, I almost forgot.
I bought a Zumba DVD set.
Hmmmm, I do wonder what I was thinking.
Everything I read online raved about how amazing Zumba is – how you can lose a dress size in 10 days; before and after pictures galore.
What I hadn’t realised was I probably needed to have been learning some of the steps prior to commencing on Monday 19th.
So Sunday 18th sees me rolling out the DVDs, gyrating and jumping around like a mad woman and realising I am approximately a million miles away from the Britney Spears routine for Baby One More Time (the Zumba inventor taught her that, you know?).

So, fairly rapidly I worked out that I was going to have to drop the Zumba lessons and find something more immediately ‘active’ than learning the ‘regaetron stomp’ in preparation for the awesome, sexy mother I was thinking I would be on the dance floor.
I didn’t have the right shoes either and I remembered I was usually drunk when I did that kind of dancing.

That Monday night I googled ’30 minute workout’ and I found ’30 Minute At Home Abs & Cardio Workout – Fitness Blender Cardio & Abs Exercises’.
What a killer!
Lucky for me there are two rounds of 15 minutes each.
Guess what?
I can do one round (just).
Then I struggle through about five minutes of the second round..
Then I go out to my workout bench and do two sets of Mish’s tricep dips.
I don’t want the workout bench to be a waste of money, although the cat does like to sit on it and survey her kingdom.
Actually, I use it for a couple of other things and I so can’t wait to have the energy to do Mish’s Jumps – Over the Fence!!
At my current fitness level though, after I have jogged on the spot for a minute it would be dangerous to me, the cat and the fitness bench to attempt any kind of jumping.
Don’t even talk to me about those burpees.
(my husband asked me what burpees were and I showed him, then I did a burp and said that must be why they are called ‘burpees’.
Burpees? Please explain.)

OK, so that is it, I think, in sharing my preparations for the commencement of round four of 12WBT.

The first week of round four finishes tomorrow.
I will share my ‘successes’ and my complete ‘fails’, of which there are equal number when I next blog.
I know there are girls who did the SSS thing today (Super Saturday Something), trying to burn off 1000 calories.
I think I consumed 1000 calories at my nieces 16th birthday.

Spaghetti and meatballs cupcakes
I know this is wrong….

I wish I was one of those ‘other’ girls; the ones who will have their photos taken at the Round Four Finale with Mish and go up on stage and compete in the fitness challenge thing.
I’m not sure what it is.
Maybe I’m shy.
Maybe I’m rebellious.
Maybe I’m scared.
But I do wish everyone well and I am truly in awe of the achievements of so many – yeah, I think I’m scared, because I totally know I don’t have their devotion, discipline, enthusiasm, willpower, strength, determination and, and, and.
I have seen amazing things and I just don’t think I can be that amazing.
But I will lose the weight I need to and I will be real about it all and I will have fun doing it 🙂

‘Willpower; the forgotten muscle’


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